on the recovery road...

in the last one year several things have happened. unpleasant things, emotionally draining experiences, learning opportunities interspersed with few small victories. And i hate to say this believe me if you will, but my faith in humanity was shaken so badly it was on the verge of collapse. it was resurrected not by high sounding preaching all knowledgable adults, but by my newest employee, sikander.

i dont know how all this is going to end, but to find somebody who believes in the virtue of work and honesty is such a healing experience, it can heal the deepest of wounds. And the best part is this, he has not been taught, he doesnt believe that this is the truth, its a natural extension of his personality, he has discovered it for himself.

There are people who believe in certain virtues that have been taught to them. you should be honest, you should be truthfull, you should be this and that. And so caught in these 'you should be's' they lead a life of forever trying to pursue these ideals. No wonder, there mind is always pulling in the other direction and they are forever trying to resist temptation, never really trusting themselves, lest they stray away from these tried tested ideals. Leading unauthentic lives, trapped in a self image created by others. And the worst part is that this self image is an escape from reality for such people, completely devoid of any sembelance to reality. what a waste.
then there is another bunch of people who consider these virtues to be pure bunkum. they have never tried them, never tested them, but still have reached the consensus that these are bookish things. Completely useless in the practical state of affairs.

And then there is another bunch who fail regularly, who stumble and fall and learn from there own mistakes. there values whatever they have are their own, born of experience, discovered in this real world laboratory. they dont depend on mentors and gurus, yes they listen and then they try out and see if it works, if its worth another try, but they dont believe in what people say. Such people exercise thier own judgement, off course they screw up, who can be right everytime!! when you were trying to walk as a kid, you dint read a tutorial or how to do it guide, you also dint research it on the net and prepare a report. you just stood up and tried, there were people helping you, supporting you and encouraging you and you fell, sometimes you fell bad and you thought you never gonna walk! but hell you did learn it dint you. These people are authentic, there tastes are not standard, there beliefs are not standard, because they dont know or care what that standard is anyways. sometimes such people are called fools because they are not afraid of falling down and so they fall. who cares! such people as i said fail most of the times but when they get it right, boy do they get it right or what!! that right is so completely original that there is an army of people trying to follow it. sometimes they become succesfull sometimes they dont, sometimes they are heartbroken, sometimes they are happy, but one thing is sure, they do live life on their own unique terms, a life of emotions, spontaniety and discovery! Such people are most of the times funny, they cant help it, life is a bloody joke for them because there are just so many contradictions around that there is no one fit for all rule. but these contradictions make the journey interesting because they are not here with a preset agenda of proving something or forcefitting something. they are here to explore and discover simple.